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May 22, 2013 / gameofslaves

Yet another month goes by

I have been busy, as usual, working on building the home-life… and playing games so I might better learn what I like and what doesn’t work.

I found a game VERY similar to what I wanted to do with Hell Breaks Loose.  And it got me thinking… (which is dangerous, in and of itself)…  Are my efforts pointless?  Could I do as well or better?  Would it look like I was trying to outdo that author-creator?  Would there be any benefit to this niche gaming community?

I lost my stride at that point.  I turned more toward my writing, only to receive a copy of a book one of my coworkers had published.

With all my writing, and all my work… and he gets published.

At first, I thought “it’s not fair”. He struggles to work out plot-points, and maintain his arcs. Grammar and spelling issues dog his heels with every step.  (…some which his editor(s) failed to spot before printing.) And I wondered, “How is this fair?”

The stories come easy for me. Plot points? No problem. Finding logic in a sideways plot-jump? Give me a sec– Got it; done. Need a new character name? Breeze. Need a secondary character to be busy with something, but not related to the story?  Had that planned already.

What does the coworker have that I do not? It took only a few minutes before it hit me.

This is what “isn’t fair”: I have talent, ideas, skills. He has his work done.

That’s it.

That’s the simplest answer.

It seems more than fair to me, after thinking about it.

He got it done. He got it submitted. He got it published.

I don’t hate him. I’m not angry at the Fates. I’m not feeling scorned by the Powers That Be. I’m frustrated by my own self.  Blame for this “imbalance of fairness” goes to no one but myself. …and the title of this blog entry (“Yet another month goes by”) should be the biggest clue.

I need to dedicate time to completing my projects. 40+ incomplete projects have little value compared to one complete project.

From myself and others, I have seen so many works-in-progress, over the years… games, books, movies, TV pilots, paintings… but none were “successful” until they were completed.

Why am I writing this?  Because these posts are reminders to myself, and hopefully useful to others in similar positions.

…why am I writing this, instead of actually working on one of my projects?

Okay, I don’t have a reasonable answer to that one.  *grin*

— Cam

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